Sorry for such a long time in-between updates. It’s been quite a hectic month or two, and I’ve kind of been putting this off. Getting a promotion at work, travelling, and just life in general have really put updating this here blog on the back-burner. But fret not! I’ve definitely still been keeping up with the training…for the most part. I obviously still go to sleep every night diapered; at this point, it’s become such a comfort thing, that I think trying to fall asleep without padding would actually be difficult. Really, the biggest difference is that I don’t even try to set the alarm every night. At best, it’s about once every two nights, but sometimes it will be only twice in a week. This isn’t because I’ve given up or reached some sort of complacency. Rather it’s because I already wake up at some point every night having to pee, so the alarm is somewhat redundant. I do keep doing it just to make sure I reinforce the idea of peeing in the night in case I start slipping, but I wouldn’t be surprised if at some point in the near future I stop the alarm altogether.
Sadly, I still have not woken up in the morning with absolutely no recollection of wetting, but there have been a couple of nights where the memory of waking up to pee is so hazy that it almost seems like it was just another part of a dream. For other nights, the routine of waking up in the middle of the night is kind of a 50/50. Some nights, I wake up and practically immediately start wetting, knowing subconsciously that’s why I woke up before quickly falling back asleep. Other nights, I kind of have to reposition myself to get into a more comfortable position and somewhat force the flow to get started. I think part of the hesitation on the latter nights is because I’m still worried about leaks. While I haven’t had anything too terrible happen, I feel like I still have this worry in the back of my mind that leaking would be terrible, when I need to somehow learn to accept it as a part of bedwetting. I do know that wearing cloth diapers to bed should in theory provide more protection, and thus a bigger sense of security, but I think I’m still a bit unnerved from my first try with cloth, when I had perhaps the worst leak to date. Either way, I really can’t be any happier with how the training is going so far.
Another fun little thing I’ve noticed is that it seems like my bladder control in general has gotten slightly weaker. Not enough to worry about having any real accidents during the day, but certainly enough that it’s noticeable. When I was younger, I could easily hold my bladder for hours. Nowadays, it becomes such a nuisance after even 30 minutes that I don’t ever really try to hold it when the urge arises, either finding the nearest bathroom, or using the bathroom around my waist. I think this happened due to a couple of factors. For one, the bathroom at my work is all of 15 seconds away, so frequent trips to the bathroom are not really a detriment to my productivity and thus I feel no reason to hold it in order to get more work done. Two, I’ve practically become a 14/7 user of diapers, basically wearing all the time unless I’m at work, with family/vanilla friends, or on the few days where I’m just not totally in the mood and decide to wear boring old underwear. Of course, this means that the majority of my time I just go whenever I feel the urge, as there is no real reason to hold it. Lastly, I used to always hold it for the entire 8 or so hours when I was asleep, which obviously contributed to strengthening my bladder. Now, I wake up at least once, if not twice, a night to pee, so I certainly do not hold it for nearly as long. While entirely related to the training, I do think that having a somewhat weakened bladder and having this idea of basically never holding it in is helpful to achieving my night-time incontinence.
So, that’s basically been the last two months or however long it’s been. While nothing major has happened, I’m pretty pleased with my slow-but-consistent fall into becoming a bedwetter. I might write another post soon that’s unrelated to my progress, so if you have any suggestions for what to write about, just post a comment below. As always, stay padded and have a great day!